She asked Fox E out to dinner, and introduced him to Yelp as a tool for cataloguing his eating endeavors. Her name-as anyone familiar with Fox E's body of work can tell you-was Barbie. But he only took this passion online at the behest of a very special someone.Īfter one fateful Texan tour stop circa 2011, Fox E was approached by one of the concert-goers he had lured in via mass Facebook message. "It was around the clock crap." But it worked, and because of his now-obsolete guerrilla marketing tactics, he was able to successfully tour the US for years, singing John Lennon covers in bookstores and playing piano originals for small café crowds.Īfter shows, Fox E would try to establish himself among attendees by asking for food recommendations and dining with welcome fans, and so he fell in love with eating like a local while living out of his car and getting by on CD sales. "It was way more time consuming than anything I've done on Yelp," he said. And if you can imagine, I did promotion for my shows on the same insane level that I do for my Yelp reviews."įox E would create masses of Facebook accounts by hand in order to send friend requests to, then invite, ridiculous numbers of locals to each and every one of his tour stops. "I was really touring constantly," he told me. He manages to be manically sex-crazed, entirely self-obsessed, and still the best that a Yelper can be, giving an informed review of an establishment from a refreshingly assertive place of narcissism.īefore the dawn of his Yelp days, Fox E worked as a traveling musician and "peace activist," as his own bio will tell you. The review continues for more than 600 words, in which Fox E gives recommendations, compares prices with those of other tea parlors in the area, and provides twenty-four more bars of perverted boba rap. It makes the tourists to NY sever all family TIESĪnd move to NYC so they can frequent BOBA GUYS It makes the girls pull down their skirts, I'm like, Girls, that's not WISE It makes the boys whip out their junk, I'm like Dudes, Zip your FLIES It goes right up my nostrils, on my shirt, and in my EYESĪnd I don't care, I keep on slurping cuz it's BOBA GUYS Les Petits Morts, like group sex where everybody CRIES I've yelped about my morning glory, with the sun I RISEīut now it's time to Yelp about the legend: BOBA GUYSĮvery time I sip these drinks a small part of me DIES I've yelped the bad, I've yelped the good, I've yelped my PENIS SIZE I've seen the lowest lows and I've lived the highest HIGHS Take, for example, the intro to his recent review of Boba Guys, a bi-coastal bubble tea chain: They typically blow past 500 words often take the form of poem, limerick, or rap song and, without fail, manage to be seethingly horny.
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